thank you for the comments i appreciate them
my next goal is to actually get irl friends but im cooked for a bunch of reasons:
i only have like two interests which not many people i know care about
i barely know how to talk to people and im scared of doing that
i hate people my age and avoid them in public
everyone in my school already has friends and none of them really want to be around me
im scared to join clubs and there wouldnt be any i enjoy anyway
im scared to try new things
i havent had any real friends since 2020
ive already lost all my friends twice in my life
sounds like you’ve got nothing to lose