@kiwi

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession.

If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead, murdered by my brother-in-law Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, Hank came to me with a rather, shocking proposition. He asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using his connections in the drug world. Connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded, I... I always thought that Hank was a very moral man and I was... thrown, confused, but I was also particularly vulnerable at the time, something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me on a ride along, and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin so I agreed. Every day, I think back at that moment with regret. I quickly realized that I was in way over my head, and Hank had a partner, a man named Gustavo Fring, a businessman. Hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man, and when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling out. From what I can gather, Hank was always pushing for a greater share of the business, to which Fring flatly…

ok which one of you guys made a last.fm page for that youtube video i made that unexpectedly blew up

because it definitely wasn’t me

i fail to understand the appeal of stanley cups

like, of all the things we could have turned into status symbols, we decided to go with an overpriced water bottle? really?

only five accounts, huh?

that’s not a whole lot, but i guess this is the calme before the storm…

…i’ll let myself out

i’ve done it.

i finished my playthrough of every main route in the masterpiece that is undertale.

here’s the valuable life lessons the game has taught me:

1. “just because you can fight the funni skeleton man from the memes, doesn’t mean you should fight the funni skeleton man from the memes.”

2. “next time, play games blind.”

i tried using a vr headset yesterday and when I took it off i had an inception moment where i couldn’t tell what was real

today’s wise thought:

batman

comment on this post and i’ll make chatgpt write a response to your comment

(nothing inappropriate and no images)

i know nobody asked, but in the unlikely event that someone might in the future, i think i should clear something up.

a few accounts with "kiwi" in the name are being created on wasteof and then following me. i’ve been playing along with the joke because i think it's pretty funny, but promise i do not own these accounts at all and they aren’t being created by me to boost statistics. @kiwi is my only account. if i ever were to have an alternate account, i’d specifically say so on my profile.

finally bought undertale and i’m about to play it for the first time in 2 years

i’m gonna avoid the fandom this time around though :P

i finally did it

i finally watched megamind

i think this is the first time a dreamworks movie has made me question who the victim really is

out of all the quotes veggietales has given me, the one i use the most is “personally i found it riveting, full of flawed characters and classic american humor ”

uhhhh, there’s this weird @evil-kiwi guy that just showed up on wasteof…

i have no affiliation with him! don’t take him seriously! if he offers you candy in his white van then grab the candy quickly and get out!

for some reason on both max and hulu/disney+, the descriptions for some of the episodes in the last season of regular show are laughably vague and nondescript.

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