also turns out I share a birthday with the weeknd
only cool mfers are born on feb 16th
I love staring directly into the eyes of the cashier as I hit the no tip button on their ipad 
anyone know a good soundboard app for windows with keybinds that's not voicemof
I just shat myself in my maths exam
Basically we were sitting down doing maths and I, being a dumbass, didn't go to the toilet first, thinking I could hold it. However, when we got in the exam I realised I had deceived myself. My stomach started groaning insanely loudly after the first 10 minutes and I got really scared the invigilators would tell me off.
The previous day I had explosive diarrhea so I probably should have been more prepared but I wasn't. After about 45 minutes I couldn't even do the paper any more. I had to focus on not shitting myself - it felt like if I even budged over in my seat, the seal would break and it would come gushing out. It was horrible.
Eventually I literally couldn't hold it more. While desperately clasping the sides of the desk for support I accidentally dropped my pen. Shit. Dangerously, I leaned over to pick it up and that's when it happened. Diarhhea started exploding out my ass.
It came with such force that it BROKE THROUGH my trousers and pants and sprayed all over the desks behind me, drenching the 3 people behind me like some sort of shit shotgun. Of course by now the entire exam hall was screaming but I was just wimpering. People started throwing up, covering their exam papers with puke as well as the shit already there. I was on one of the back rows, so the shit silhouettes of the students covered in it were stained on the wall.
I got excluded and the students affected will get special considerations. My future is ruined.
swifties are batshit insane I simply commented on a golden globes post asking why is taylor there and now I'm a fat short ugly angry little batman obsessed fan boy with this cat woman trying to stalk me and report me to my relatives.
creepy ass pedophile shit
radiohead album ranking
Pablo Honey - 8/10
The Bends - 8/10
Ok Computer - 10/10
Kid A - 10/10
Amnesiac - 9/10
Hail to the Thief - 8/10
In Rainbows - 8/10
The King of Limbs - 4/10
A Moon Shaped Pool - 6/10
overall ranking: 7.9/10