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dertermenter @dertermenter

I just shat myself in my maths exam

Basically we were sitting down doing maths and I, being a dumbass, didn't go to the toilet first, thinking I could hold it. However, when we got in the exam I realised I had deceived myself. My stomach started groaning insanely loudly after the first 10 minutes and I got really scared the invigilators would tell me off.

The previous day I had explosive diarrhea so I probably should have been more prepared but I wasn't. After about 45 minutes I couldn't even do the paper any more. I had to focus on not shitting myself - it felt like if I even budged over in my seat, the seal would break and it would come gushing out. It was horrible.

Eventually I literally couldn't hold it more. While desperately clasping the sides of the desk for support I accidentally dropped my pen. Shit. Dangerously, I leaned over to pick it up and that's when it happened. Diarhhea started exploding out my ass.

It came with such force that it BROKE THROUGH my trousers and pants and sprayed all over the desks behind me, drenching the 3 people behind me like some sort of shit shotgun. Of course by now the entire exam hall was screaming but I was just wimpering. People started throwing up, covering their exam papers with puke as well as the shit already there. I was on one of the back rows, so the shit silhouettes of the students covered in it were stained on the wall.

I got excluded and the students affected will get special considerations. My future is ruined.

Jun 16, 2023, 7:08 PM
103
zer0 @zer0

this next experiment

Mar 16, 2024, 7:52 PM
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zer0 @zer0
zer0 @zer0

Cuphead is just horizontal Touhou

Feb 18, 2024, 5:07 PM
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Feb 28, 2024, 5:02 AM
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zer0 @zer0

baitposting

late @late

> someone tells an obscure fact

> I thought everyone knew that?

zer0 @zer0

I thought everyone knew this

factsbot @factsbot
A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs
Feb 25, 2024, 4:00 PM
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Feb 25, 2024, 4:07 PM
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Feb 26, 2024, 3:41 PM
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Feb 27, 2024, 6:02 PM
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zer0 @zer0

I thought everyone knew this

factsbot @factsbot
A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs
Feb 25, 2024, 4:00 PM
0
Feb 25, 2024, 4:07 PM
2
zer0 @zer0
lily @lily

why is the epicness of the taste of water directly proportional to the lateness of night

Feb 22, 2024, 12:31 AM
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Feb 22, 2024, 4:35 AM
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zer0 @zer0
k10398 @k10398

When you keep clicking “there are more nested posts, click here to see them” on this chain, you'll break wasteof (at least on mobile)

Feb 20, 2024, 12:06 AM
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Feb 20, 2024, 12:09 AM
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zer0 @zer0

Cuphead is just horizontal Touhou

Feb 18, 2024, 5:07 PM
0