I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
Feb 15, 2023, 3:10 PM
Today I learned that changing random stuff until your program works is "hacky" and a "bad coding practice" but if you do it fast enough it's "Machine Learning" and pays 4x your current salary.
Feb 13, 2023, 3:10 PM
Your momma is so fat, you need to switch to NTFS to store a picture of her.
Feb 12, 2023, 3:10 PM
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
Feb 11, 2023, 3:17 PM
Two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Feb 10, 2023, 3:10 PM
"Honey, go to the store and buy some eggs."
"OK."
"Oh and while you're there, get some milk."
He never returned.
Feb 8, 2023, 3:10 PM
The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Feb 7, 2023, 3:10 PM
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.
A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn't.
Feb 6, 2023, 3:10 PM
The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
Feb 5, 2023, 3:10 PM
I have a joke about trickle down economics, but 99% of you will never get it.
Feb 1, 2023, 3:10 PM