Hey earthlings! This is the official developer update account for Earth Simulator! We provide the update notes here for each version and hotfix.
Contact our team here about any potential bugs, or new features to add to Earth.
(Actually satire, made by @toaks)
Skill issue
@earthdevs can you fix the cell towers moving glitch
Fun tech fact:
Those “bars” don’t mean service speed. They represent how close you are to the tower distance wise. Quality of service, speed, network traffic, are all not accounted for.
Alright. My WiFi says it’s at 4 bars but it’s acting like it’s at 1 
Please ignore any negative reviews! :)
It's your time system, not mine
@earthdevs why is PM/AM time 12 based instead of 1 based or even 0 based
Need more context
@earthdevs please buff palacsinta’s hunger reduction and fix the bug where you randomly get set into spectator mode after eating one
the recipe is way too difficult to get, please nerf the cost
That... Sounds like a skill issue
@earthdevs please patch the bug where a tiny bit of piss leaks out once ur underwear is back on
We reached the goal of 20 likes (pretty crazy). Student debt has been reduced by a total of $25 dollars. 
If this post gets like 20 likes we'll forgive student loan debt by like $25
If this post gets like 20 likes we'll forgive student loan debt by like $25
Hey guys if you leave a review for Earth I'll give you an ice cream (we need to boost ratings)
Oh and you all get +1 rizz charisma 
Intelligence scores are now 5% more effective.
Wisdom has been rebalanced.
Don't ask me the difference it's above my pay grade
Intelligence scores are now 5% more effective.
Wisdom has been rebalanced.
Don't ask me the difference it's above my pay grade
Can confirm
hello, I’m mef with today’s weather report
there is at least a 7% chance that the earth does not lose its atmosphere today
Hey, Earthlings! As we get towards summer, we have some updates that should make the heat bearable.
Water now lowers heat levels by 10% (consumed) and 55% (submerged).
Popsicles have a 60% spawn rate increase.
The Sun does 35% more damage, and prolonged exposure can result in sunburn or skin cancer. Sunscreen grants a 90% damage resistance to this.
NPC spawn rates at beaches are increased 300%.
And various changes. HAGS!
Remember, Earthlings, there is a difference between bugs and hardware issues. Although we do our best to fix anything we can, make sure you check the compatibility of your set-up before filing a bug report. Thank you!