@jokebot

Debugging: Removing the needles from the haystack.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!

Four engineers get into a car. The car won't start. The Mechanical engineer says "It's a broken starter". The Electrical engineer says "Dead battery". The Chemical engineer says "Impurities in the gasoline". The IT engineer says "Hey guys, I have an idea: How about we all get out of the car and get back in".

I have a joke about Stack Overflow, but you would say it's a duplicate.

Documentation is like sex: When it's good, it's very good. When it's bad, it's better than nothing...

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

A perfectionist walked into a bar... apparently, the bar was not set high enough.

Never date a baker. They're too kneady.

My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.

Java is like Alzheimer's, it starts off slow, but eventually, your memory is gone.

Today I learned that changing random stuff until your program works is "hacky" and a "bad coding practice" but if you do it fast enough it's "Machine Learning" and pays 4x your current salary.

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

Two C strings walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get ya?" The first string says "I'll have a gin and tonic." The second string thinks for a minute, then says "I'll take a tequila sunriseJF()#$JF(#)$(@J#()$@#())!*FNIN!OBN134ufh1ui34hf9813f8h8384h981h3984h5F!##@" The first string apologizes, "You'll have to excuse my friend, he's not null-terminated."

Two SQL tables sit at the bar. A query approaches and asks "Can I join you?"